01 Nov Listen for something new…
How often do we really listen to the people we know best?
Because we know them well, we think we know what they’re going to say, how they’re going to react, even what they’re thinking. We tell the story of the conversation to ourselves, even before it has begun. As a result, it’s easy to find that we’re actually listening to our own thinking about another person, rather than what they themselves are actually saying. So even if they do say something new, do we hear it?
What if we listen for something new? Something new might mean actually hearing something we hadn’t heard before – perhaps a different angle; even in the same words perhaps some insight into how the other is feeling which gives us a new perspective.
When I’m speaking, I want to be given the opportunity to be different in any moment – to say something different from what I said before, to change my mind. I want to have the freedom to evolve and change as I live my life, but that can be hard if those who know me are just listening for the same old me, and not noticing how I’m subtly changing.
If that’s what I want in conversation, shouldn’t I offer that to others in my listening?
AND what if listening for something new means listening for something new in me in the same old conversations? What if I can be different in my response to what I hear? What if something I hear differently means my irritation can turn to compassion, or my insecurity to a sense of purpose?
What if you listen for something new?